Paul's Oriental Travelogue

On my latest trip to Burma I discovered a very unusual corduroy

[New scene. J. Peterman's office.] Secretary: Elaine, it's Mr. Peterman on the phone. Elaine: (answers the phone) Hello, Mr. Peterman, how are you feeling? J. Peterman: Elaine, I'll be blunt. I'm burnt out. I'm fried. My mind is as barren...
Continue reading On my latest trip to Burma I discovered a very unusual corduroy...

I'm a member, let me in!

I just had a quick vacation in America. Yes, I went to the US Embassy to register my presence in Myanmar. I haven't done this before; Dave wanted to in Bangkok but we never got around to it. But Myanmar...
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Oh, you bastards

ACCESS HAS BEEN DENIEDAccess to the page: http://www.salon.com... has been denied for the following reason:Banned site: salon.comYou are seeing this error because the page you attempted to access contains, or is labelled as containing, material that has been deemed inappropriate.If...
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Yangon Nightlife: Or How I Happened to Make a Molotov Cocktail

Here's a scene for the upcoming Presidential library. So there I am at only 11:15 PM, on 37th street, Yangon, shouting threats and obscenities at the second floor of the huge colonial edifice that contains all my Asian possessions. The...
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On The Road to Mandalay

The locals are getting a bit rowdy so it's time I got on the road to Mandalay. I can hardly walk down a market street without being shot with water guns every ten feet. They do it to everyone but...
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Why you gotta be like that, Mandalay?

23. Twenty three hours on the railroad from Rangoon to Mandalay. At a distance of 643 kilometers, that's an overall average of 17 miles per hour from 7:30 PM on Sunday to just after 6:20 Monday evening, into Mandalay station....
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Floatin on the River

That bug from Mandalay was more than food poisoning cause it's stuck with me like the unnatural fetid stink of Burmese dirt. There's walking pneumonia, is there walking dysentery? There is now. I've laid myself up for a day both...
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Misadventure

Hello, gasp, I'm here! Thanks for the concern and addiction to the web site but my abduction by Kachin insurgents was a marvelous, educational experience and I learned to love them like a dog for his master, living in Stockholm......
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"Uncle"

Let's hear it for Kerry Brougham, Chief Rescuer of Stupid Americans (actual title: Consul) at the Rangoon Consular Section, for saving your hapless narrator from a life of destitution and crime on the streets of Rangoon. I got back to...
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